Pregnant and feeling like I’m in over my head?
I’m almost 17 weeks pregnant and consistently worried about the stability of my growing familys’ finances. I had to leave my night shift job a few weeks ago due to severe exhaustion and ‘morning’ sickness; I had hoped to work throughout my pregnancy to save money.
My husband is graduating college this month, and works part time at a job based on tips (his income fluctuates). He does not seem as worried as I am about our future financial situation. I’m so anxious about what kind of jobs he will be able to find when he gets out there next year, if it will be enough to support our little family. This is an unexpected pregnancy, and though I’m thrilled at the idea of being a mother I’m less than enthused about continuing to live in his parents’ beach house (rent free) because we can’t afford to go it on our own. I appreciate his family’s help, but I feel like I don’t have anything to call my own which is entirely depressing. Has anyone else been in a less than perfect financial situation when you became pregnant? How did you cope with the depression and anxiety?
Tagged with: feeling • head • like... • Over • Pregnant
Filed under: Pregnancy Depression Support
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I’m currently 17 wks to an in a financial rut.My pregnancy was also unplanned but Im stoked at the idea of becoming a new mom. I’m in the process of being laid off from my job and my boyfriend works a part-time an his hours fluctuate. We currently stay with my mom rent free but I’m more than ready to move on to start my own family. So I feel your pain and I wish I could tell u the remedy or miracle answer but I’m struggling to find it to. Good luck and congrats!
Right now, I think very few people are completely stable financially. Its scarry for alot of people right now. The thing is, you have to pick things to stress about. Living rent free, is not something to stress about..think about it as a means to an end. Eventually, things will be the way you want..your husband will get a job, you will be able to work again, etc..it will all work out. IIt may not feel like it right now, but it will! Just take care of yourself and your growing baby right now!
hes graduating soon, so you guys are working on being truly independent! i hate having others help me and my husband, but we are truly lucky to have people that are in a situation where they can help. i was so worried in the beginning of my pregnancy, my husband lost his job and his mom was sending us money every month to help us get by, i felt terrible, why were we bringing a child into our family if we can even support ourselves, but my husband found a better job and now we are making it, we have caught up all our bill but we dont have any extra money! we are slowly but surely getting back on track, our bills are paid, we have food, and more importantly we have each other! we are the poorest that we have ever been, but also we are the happiest we’ve ever been! you’ll start to feel better, its normal to worry about these things! good luck and best wishes
Well all i can say is that you have to take it day bu day , no need to worry so much even though it may be hard to stop,,,i am some what in your situation and use to worry so much but i found it only made me sick and it was not worth . leave it on gods hangs and you will be ok .
Pleeez…..just enjoy your pregnancy and think good thoughts about how you will be with your baby. Stop worrying.There will always be things to worry about in life, don’t let it deter you from enjoying motherhood.
First, congratulations on your unexpected surprise.
I wish you a happy, healthy and safe pregnancy & delivery!
As for your financial situation; I can’t say that I’ve had the same experience during pregnancy. At one point I was in financial trouble but I was younger and single and not very worried about it. I completely understand that you are indeed worried about your finances as you begin a family– the surge in hormones will undoubtedly make you fret more too.
As a 3rd party to your situation I see it in a totally different light. I consider you, your husband and your new baby very blessed. I see a new family starting off on the right track. I think it is so loving and thoughtful that your in-laws are so very supportive of your circumstances. I know many, many people who would gladly be in your shoes right now. Rather than feel guilty or feel badly for being in a fortunate circumstance you may want to try to take this opportunity to be humbled and acknowledge that my dear, you are truly blessed.
Starting a marriage and a family is hard work and it takes time. Eventually you and your husband will be on your own and believe me there will be plenty of opportunities in life to bless your in-laws back. It doesn’t necessarily have to be financial by any means. What is a blessing to one is not the same to another (it could be simply spending family time together once a week!). I’m also sure you’ll have other opportunities to “pay it forward” by random acts of kindness toward others.
From your explanation it doesn’t sound like you are someone who takes anything in life for granted or that you would take advantage of another’s kindness. Also it’s obvious you are a hard worker. This is probably why you are so blessed.
Well, I’m 16, and my mom won’t let me get a job. She says I have to finish school first. My daughter’s dad dumped me when I was 5 months pregnant, and almost all of my money saving plans fell through suddenly.
SO right now, I’m living in my mother’s house, and she helps me pay for EVERYTHING. I try to pitch in where I can, but that’s not a lot and I feel worse than useless.
I guess I’ve been dealing by continuing to tell myself that by accepting all the help that I’m getting, I’m allowing my daughter to have the best life she can right now. When I can help more, I most certainly will, but for now, I’m grateful for the support I’m getting.
When I fell pregnant with my 1st child I lived in what was basically a garage with a small gas heater that constantly failed and an outside toilet. It was snowing and I had to go out to the loo twice a night in it lol! By the time baby arrived we had found a half decent place to rent and I stayed at home with my son while my partner worked 50 night time hours a week for minimum wage. Everything for the baby was preowned but the baby was well fed, clean and cared for and had 2 parents who thought the world of him. I have now been married 8 years during which time I have had 2 more sons and have a daughter due in feb. Due to my husbands immigration status he was not allowed to take employment for 5 years whilst we battled the home office in court and I have become slightly disabled through pregnancy and cannot work. We are still renting, have not been in a position to save and this baby will also have pre owned cot and clothes etc but at the end of the day it is really NOT about material things. The love and laughter in our house is worth more than any money in the world and I feel sorry for people who cant see that. So please do not feel anxious about money. Because you obviously care about your family then you will get by. something Always works out. And dont waste the precious time you have with your baby worrying about it. that time is gone too soon…. one more thing..your husband maybe just as anxious as you but men find it harder to show, especially if hes worried about stressing you out even more than you already are. If you really feel depressed to the point where you feel you cant cope then do see your doctor. I wish you all the best for the future. x